Secrets

Your secrets are making me crazy. The things you don't want me to tell people are things you SHOULD'VE told them already. The worst part is that if your lying to me i will be crushed. I've known bascially since i moved up here you've become a little brother to me and i know its your life, your (stupid) choices. but it tears me apart to sit back and watch you fuck u pyour life when you have potenial. You have a brain and i know that you know how to use it. You just choose not too. and i will never understand why.

And yes it truely bothers me because i feel like a sibling and he treats me like one. they're family treats me like of their own. so now i feel like i messed up. Like i missed it somewhere along the line. Like there was a test on how to be there for your friends and family and i failed it. I didn't go to the study groups thus i bombed teh test. I don't know what made you think this was a good choice but it was a SHITTY choice if you were trying to being rebelious. I just want to smack you upside the head and yell "STUPID BOY!!!"

The Worst part is that i don't know if your lying to me. I know you inside and out and trust though everyone else tells me not too. I honestly do. So if your lying to me i won't be able to look at you the same way. If your really going so far out of your way to make an ass out of me i'm gonna be devistated. All thoughs times i stood up for you saying that you weren't an asshole all the time, that you can be a really good person. You'd just be going and proving all thoughs people right. and you don't care about them but no that puts into questin if you care about me?

is my friendship really so worthless to you that you decide to humilate me?

idk but i guess we're going to find out. i'll keep your secrets but know that if your messing with me i'm walking out of yoru life and i'm not coming back. I've forgiven you for a lot of shit but this would be crossing the line.

idk maybe i'm stupid for trusting you and trying to see the better in you. I've found that the more i do that the more i get hurt. but i guess i'm a masacist. if that's the case.

i believe that you have to see past the shitty parts of people and try to focus on the better. and as a result i've been made a fool of a lot but i've also made friends who have stood up for me and been there for me. so i consider it worth it.

does that make me stupid? for trying to see what your really like instead of some shiny candy coated outside. idk i guess i'm stupid then.